I've had my first ever spray on tan.
Why have I avoided it so long? Because I don't like the colour orange. It doesn't suit my complexion. And I don't like the thought of getting near naked in front of a stranger. So why did I decide to have one now?
Well - firstly I was told the colour of spray tan is olive. Not orange. But then I thought olive was green. What do I know!? And then - 'do you want to wear these paper thong knickers - or your own?' Tough decision that. NOT. 'So we'll just rub some cream on your dry bits - knees, elbows etc.' she says... 'Do you have any other dry bits' Is she having a laugh? I'm 50. My whole body is dry! 'Now you can get in the tent - and take your bra off'. HAHAHAHAHA NO. WAY. JOSÉ. Aimee is young, tiny with abs and pert boobs. There is no way I was releasing mine. Even the cat hasn't seen them and he's always in the bathroom when I have a shower. Anyway - enough of the boobs. Aimee told me about her experiences of spray tans - wearing paper thongs - she was told to bend over so the spray would get into the crease beneath her bum cheeks. Dear God. (Must add here - Rachel I love you...but there is no way I am bending over in your tan box). Anyway - the result. Not too bad to be honest. Aimee kept it light so the dogs still recognise me. My dry patches aren't darker than the rest of me. I look like I've just had a week in Italy. Result. Thanks Aimee xx
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November 2022
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